Singing in public terrifies me, which is funny because my mom regularly taught me to sing show tunes and put me on stage to sing in front of crowds at county fairs and talent shows. Sometimes I wish I was that young and fearless 4-8 year old, happy to share some joy with the world. Beginning my Master of Music in violin performance at age 30 nearly paralyzed me with fear. The violin world is cut-throat. I had chosen a diva instrument that didn’t, does not, mesh well with my non-confrontational personality. I just want everyone to be happy and like me, which is too much to ask when you really want to play and play well.
I have worked through most of that initial crippling fear now, and find myself truly, madly, deeply enthralled with the desire to master my instrument and have the ability to play for the sake of the music. To be a light. To bring joy. No competition or ugliness. I have found my voice. I am learning to use it.
So, I write. I practice. I research and read. I am translating an incredible masterclass of violinist Henryk Szeryng and writing about him. I hope to share with the world soon. It has been calling me and the timing is now right.
I hope you’ll join me on this ride, sharing my thoughts to the world through a blog. It is almost as frightening as performing once was. I am channeling my inner little girl who wasn’t afraid to sing “The Sun will Come out Tomorrow”, because it will! and Oh my! Life is a beautiful thing when it is filled with deep love and devotion and a great sense of one’s purpose and mission here on earth. I will share my voice.